Includes index.

Preface ix
Acknowledgments xv
Introduction 1 (6)
Necessary Alterations
2 (2)
My Parent, My Friend
4 (3)
One: Who Am I? Who Are They? 7 (18)
The Family Fishnet
9 (2)
Different Generations, Different Views
11 (6)
Your History Together
17 (1)
Making Choices, Initiating Change
18 (4)
Still Your Parents
22 (3)
Two: Still Driving You Crazy 25 (28)
So Annoying
27 (9)
Addressing Trouble Spots
36 (7)
Coping with Relationship Gaps
43 (8)
Your New, Leading Role
51 (2)
Three: Staying Connected 53 (18)
Short-Circuiting Guilt Trips
55 (3)
The Frequency Factor
58 (3)
The Near or Far Dilemma
61 (2)
Turning Estranged Relationships Around
63 (3)
Keeping Everyone Happy
66 (5)
Four: Drawing Boundaries 71 (16)
Defining Boundaries
74 (2)
Changing Patterns
76 (4)
Who's the Parent?
80 (7)
Five: Your Partners, Spouses, and In-Laws 87 (14)
I'd Like You to Meet ...
89 (1)
The Underlying Issues
90 (6)
Surmounting In-Law Difficulties
96 (5)
Six: Your Parent's New Partner 101 (16)
Puzzling Choices
102 (4)
New Families, New Roles
106 (5)
Unraveling the Logistics
111 (3)
Seeing Things Differently
114 (3)
Seven: Sibling Complications, Sibling Support 117 (16)
The Family System
118 (2)
Sibling Frustrations
120 (1)
Troublemakers and High-Maintenance Siblings
121 (4)
You Like Him Better ... Still
125 (4)
Sibling Assistance
129 (4)
Eight: Money Matters 133 (21)
Receiving Money from Your Parents
136 (5)
Claiming Rights to Your Parents' Money
141 (4)
When Parents' Generosity Makes You Uncomfortable
145 (3)
Parents Needing Financial Help from You
148 (6)
Nine: Career Directions and Decisions 154 (15)
Great Expectations
156 (2)
Going into the Family Business
158 (5)
Measuring Up
163 (2)
Surpassing a Parent
165 (4)
Ten: Relationship Shifts 169 (9)
Illness Changes the Relationship
170 (3)
When a Parent Dies
173 (2)
Losing Your Childhood Home
175 (3)
Eleven: It's a Boy! Parents as Grandparents 178 (19)
Not Living Up to Your Expectations
181 (3)
Expectations Met
184 (2)
Inevitable In-Law Comparisons and Conflicts
186 (4)
Protecting Your Own
190 (7)
Twelve: Parent to Peer-The Friendship Model 197 (22)
Starting Points
199 (3)
Eight Ground Rules for Ensuring Friendship
202 (15)
The Intangibles That Fortify Friendships
217 (2)
Thirteen: A Work in Progress The Generational Picture 219 (10)
From the Same Cloth
220 (2)
Parents Are People, Too
222 (3)
And the Bond Goes On ...
225 (1)
Modeling for the Next Generation
226 (3)
Authors Note 229 (3)
Index 232

Offers strategies and techniques for improving the relationship between adult children and their parents, discussing familiar challenges such as holiday conflicts, money issues, children, and guilt trips.